HiatusMedia

Jack, Ashley and James was an audio series by Bunnyreaper. It was never intended to be published - the audio files were rattling around his computer - but as usual Pianoabuser stole them and put them online.

You can download each episode by right-clicking on each title and selecting "Save Target As...."

The story of our great saviours, who risked life and limb to save the world from utter peril are thus named Jack, Ashley and James in this first gripping episode. Jack is a boy, along with Ashley, and...James. This episode encompasses all those facts: a) that they are boys, and b) that they are in the same area at the same time. That is, Jack, Ashley and James.

Oh, fuck. Jack, Ashley and James discover the power of immortality, only to be killed. This is the entire plot of this episode. Nothing more. Which means you don't have to waste our bandwidth by clicking the link. But if you really want to, you can.

Another fantastic, thrilling episode of Jack, Ashley and James sees the trio gardening backwards through lack of gardening. Instead, they watch the grass as it grows. Almost as exciting as the hidden episode on this page, where they watch paint dry.

...if I were a young boy, full of potential, and awe of the things around me, I would listen to this episode. However, after the operation, you won't be able to.

I raped a shrew once. It didn't enjoy it. That's why it's called a rape. Alas, after the drugs trial, the shrew was unable to point me out as the rapist, and I was able to get away scot-free. Thus, I was able to defecate on a microphone, and here we are.

Before you listen to this episode, please remember that I was very young, very impressionable, and all the other things that occurred after the recording of this had stolen from the ideas. And because of this, I'm sorry to all the children who are going to have to swallow the interpretations of my faeces, and accept it as truth.